Stress Management Hacks
by Karla Mohtashemi
We’ve dealt with a lot this year. A worldwide pandemic seems like the plot to a book, by Stephen King, rather than… oh wait… it was a plot to a book… hmmm… they even had the nerve to re-shoot the mini-series and run it last year.
The Stand was what I was reading when I first arrived in WA state.
But I digress.
This is about how to give yourself grace, not nightmares.
What do I mean by stress management “hacks“? Think of your brain as the most amazing computer in the world, and some simple rewiring WILL correct any issues. Worry, depression, fear, feelings of failure – these are all chemically induced and we can change the channel.
Here are a couple things that I’ve found helps me stop the worry, at least for a while, and give myself grace.
First, what does it mean to “give yourself grace”?
Websters defines it: “Do honor or credit to (someone or something) by one’s presence.
Notice it did not say by one’s perfect body, accomplishments, social status, etc.
It said – One’s presence.
Perfectly flawed, wonderful YOU, being present!
Stop comparing yourself to others. I read somewhere – “Healthy is an outfit that looks different on every body”
To put it more succinctly…
You know the kindness that you offer to others? The forgiveness you offer your pet, when he/she spills something on your favorite carpet? The time you give a toddler, who is just learning to walk, and slowing you down on your way out the door?
What if you were kind to the person in the mirror, accepting the imperfections you wouldn’t even notice on your best friend? What if you forgave yourself for mistakes and slowed down once and a while, to offer the time it takes to recover?
That is giving yourself grace.
Here are a few tools that work for me, when I’m not my own biggest fan.
- What are the Triggers? Recognize what triggers your emotional responses. Catch yourself when you are about to say something negative to yourself, feel sad, have a desire to self sabotage, over eat, give up, etc. Recognize that a form of self sabotage is to quit when you are struggling AND quit when you are succeeding! Both happen! Check out the words below. Write down the emotional needs that might make you react if you felt a threat to that need or if you feel in that state. Recognizing the trigger is paramount!
Acceptance, Boredom, Challenge, Control, Respect, Be valued, Freedom, Order, Safety, Attention, Be understood, Be right, Be needed, Be liked, Loneliness (write some of your own)
When I recognize them, sometimes I can stop the self sabotage before it starts.
Oh also, when you identify your triggers/needs, fill the need, just like you would that toddler! - Workout hard to release pent up emotions – You may cry during your workout, but it isn’t for the reason you think. We go through life suppressing emotion. Autumn Calabrese (Supertrainer for 21 Day Fix, 21 Day Fix Extreme, Masters Hammer and Chisel and 80 Day Obsession and 9 Week Control Freak) said “When you suppress the emotion, you suppress it into the muscles and into the tissue of your body as tension. So, when you are stressed you can feel it in your stomach, shoulders or neck. When you push yourself so hard in a workout, you can no longer hold that emotion in. The emotion may come out of nowhere. Your body lets it out, sometimes as tears. It may come out of nowhere. Your body has no choice but to release that emotion. It’s a cleanse. Let it go.”
- Chew some gum – Yes. This is a silly one. We cannot be happy and love ourselves more if we constantly stress ourselves out! If you are anxious or nervous at any time, chew some gum. It tricks a primal part of your brain into thinking nothing is wrong, because you couldn’t be in danger if you are eating.
Action Step: Grab some gum with xylitol. It is good for your teeth! (Spry, Trident, and a gum called Xylitol are the gums you want). Have it ready for when you feel stressed or may want to succumb to emotional eating. - Take a Breather – Most of us have been breathing for a while, right? You think you have this DOWN! Well, all things can be improved on. Do you know the ideal respiratory rate? Depending on how big you are and your lung volume, at rest, you should inhale 12 to 20 times a minute.
Try the 5, 6, 7. 8 technique. Breathe in for a count of 5. Hold for a count of 6. Exhale for a count of 7. Do this 8 times.
When you breathe correctly, it sends a signal to your brain that everything is ok.
Why does it do that? The nerve running from the base of your brain down your body (Vagus nerve) touches all of your major organs and sends messages back to your brain, telling it how your body is doing. Let your brain know you are calm and happy. Do this every time you notice you are upset and stressed. You can fool your brain into thinking the body is calm. Brain hack CHECK.
I spoke with a doctor who talks about anti-aging techniques. She went into detail about telemeres, but that’s a little too much science for right now. All we need to know is that these breathing techniques help stress, and evidently help inhibit the symptoms of the aging process!
One of the best ways I’ve found lately to ensure I am breathing properly, relaxing myself and allowing myself the time I need to properly recover is through meditation. I know!! Meditation is hard, and boring and blah blah blah. I thought the same thing! But I recently went through the 21 day meditation program on the streaming app, and it changed the game for me. If you want to sample it, just send me a message and I set it up so that you can try it free. Click here to contact me.
I have a lot more tips, and they are all going into my book. I’m writing it currently. If you want to be notified when the PDF is complete, just let me know on the contact form.
Well, there you go. And I’m going to give you one more bonus thing. Hug someone (safely). My daughter and I have both been vaccinated now, and hugged for the first time, since the pandemic quarantine started. I’m still on a high from it.
